


Emotions Suck.

by orphan_account



Series: Camp Yorktown [3]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alternate Universe - Summer Camp, Angst, Feelings, M/M, lmao apparently, lots of feelings, slight gore description but not really i wouldnt like tag it as that, the worst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-06
Updated: 2015-12-06
Packaged: 2018-05-05 05:19:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,599
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5362844
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When people ask him, this was the moment that John recounts in his memories as when he first realized the shift in his feelings toward Alex...</p><p>For some reason, George thought it would be a smart idea to not only teach them how to build fairly dangerous traps, but to turn it into a competition. John had no idea what had possessed the man to think this a good idea, and at the wolfish grin that had formed across Alex’s face as George explained their day, John should have expected something terrible was going to come out of it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Emotions Suck.

When people ask him, this was the moment that John recounts in his memories as when he first realized the shift in his feelings toward Alex. Though, looking back now, John could pick out other memories in which at the time he was confused at to what he was feeling, and scared, pushed the emotions away, but now, John recognized the familiar feelings as affection.

It was John’s 7th year at camp and George had decided to introduce them to the art of building traps - yes he called it an art. This had been something George had been alluding to teaching them for a few years, and every time he got everyone’s hopes up, he would tell them it was a skill they would _eventually_ learn. And apparently, this was the year they were to start to learn it.

For some reason, George thought it would be a smart idea to not only teach them how to build fairly dangerous traps, but to turn it into a competition. John had no idea what had possessed the man to think this a good idea, and at the wolfish grin that had formed across Alex’s face as George explained their day, John should have expected something terrible was going to come out of it.

They had been working on their traps all day, starting with the designs, moving to collecting their supplies, and finally building them. John kept sneaking a glance out of the corner of his eye to where Alexander kept cursing beside him, glaring at his trap. Of course, leave it to Alexander and his competitive blood to build something extreme and probably way too difficult - no definitely too complex - for him.

Alex let out another loud curse, provoking a look of disapproval from George. John snickered in amusement and he had only looked back down at his own trap for a second before he heard Alex let out a cry, a horrid gut wrenching sound that he had never heard his friend utter before.

His head immediately snapped back in the direction of Alex to see him crumpled on the ground, others moving toward him. View blocked by the quickly forming crowd, John rushed forward, frantically pushing his way forward till Alex was in his sight again, and when he was it honestly didn’t help to calm John.

There wasn’t a life threatening amount of blood, but it was an unsettling amount to see, staining the grass around where Alex had fallen to the floor. George was crouched down beside him, and Alex was letting out sharp gasps as George inspected the wound.

When Alex cursed loudly, John lurched forward to crouch beside Alex’s head, hand coming to rest on his friend’s shoulder for comfort. The spot was fairly grotesque in which the spear had gouged Alex’s calf, a jagged hole torn through his skin. John peered at it with interest, unable to tear his eyes away and his hand tightened on Alex’s shoulder. 

“I’m dying,” Alex moaned, “quick, someone grab a pen and paper, I need to write my eulogy.”

“You’ll live, Alex,” George’s voice was serious, but his lip twitched with slight amusement at Alex’s over dramatic moans and he stood. “I don’t think you need stitches, but you need to get this cleaned up immediately and you’re going to need to take it easy the next few days. I could call the paramedic tea-“

“I’ll do it,” John cut George off, surprising even himself at the interjection. John had only just recently received his senior medical badge, and was heavily interested in pursuing a medical career, but that didn’t make him better than trained paramedics. John inwardly cursed himself.

George raised a brow and seemed to contemplate it for a moment before nodding. “Alright. Do you need help getting him back to the cabin, or do you think you can manage on your own?”

“We can manage,” John responded, as he helped Alex amble to his feet. Alex slumped heavily against his side, and John immediately caught his weight, easily slipping an arm around his middle. 

“Alright, show me that you earned that badge, John,” George smiled and John nodded before starting to move Alex in the direction of their cabin. From behind them, John heard George say, “why is everyone standing around? Shows over, get back to your traps, you have less than 20 minutes to complete them.”

They were silent for a few moments as they slowly made their way to their cabin, John letting Alex take his time, but John broke when a soft whimper slipped between his lips. 

“I know it hurts, but you’re the one who was so determined to win this damned competition,” it was a weird feeling, John lecturing Alex for a change. “I _told_ you it was too difficult.”

Alex was quiet and John shot him a worried look.

“I could have waited for the paramedics, John,” Alex’s voice was strained, and small. John frowned at his serious response.

“It’s better if you don’t; it could get infected before they get here and then they’d have to amputate,” John shot back, hand tightening around Alex’s middle unconsciously. 

Alex scoffed. “So dramatic, my dear Laurens,” Alex smiled, though brief before his brows twisted in pain again. “Seriously though, now you don’t have a shot at winning the trap competition. You shouldn’t have thrown that away for me.”

Conversation halted as they reached the stairs to their cabin, and John let Alex use him as a beam as he hopped his way up the stairs. John stopped at the top of the stairs and looked at Alex seriously. 

“Don’t be ridiculous Alex, I’d do anything for you,” he said before he opened the door.

John helped Alex over to the table and Alex collapsed down into a chair, exhaustion settling over his body now that he was finally sitting. Alex’s skin was slick with sweat, a bead rolling down his temple, and his eyes fell shut as he caught his breath.

“I’ll be right back, I’m just going to grab medical supplies from the dining hall,” John waited for Alex to crack an eye open and nod before he departed. 

He wouldn’t say he sprinted, but he definitely jogged toward the dinning hall, moving toward the supply cabinet in search for the medical bag. His eyes scanned the shelves until they landed on the bag marked with a large red cross and he snatched it out of the cabinet. He closed the door, and was startled when he saw Angelica’s grinning face beside him. A surprised yelp fell from his lips and his hand flew to his chest to feel his racing heart.

“Jesus Angelica, you scared the shit outta me.”

Her eyes flickered to the bag in his hand before returning to his face, a knowing smile still set on her face. John cocked his head, “What?”

“How’s Alex?” she asked innocently.

“He’s Alex, what do you expect. I haven’t really had a chance to look at his leg yet, but he’ll live,” John narrowed his eyes at her. “…. What are you up to?”

“I just came to ask if Alex was alright, God John, don’t be so suspicious,” Angelica grinned again. “Give Alex a smack for me though, would you? I told him not to make something so complicated while his head was in the clouds, but clearly he didn’t listen to me, _again_.”

John laughed, “my pleasure,” and turned to leave, but froze. He turned back around and raised a brow, “What do you mean, head in the clouds?”

“You haven’t noticed? Odd since you two are practically joined at the hip… He’s been distracted all day, and he definitely wasn’t paying enough attention while building something so dangerous,” her smirk was wicked. “You know, you could technically say it was _your_ fault he got injured.”

John was affronted. “ _Me?_ I didn’t do anything!” Anger creeped into John’s voice, but Angelica only laughed.

“Well, it was _your ass_ that he was staring at when his trap went off early.”

Were John’s ears bleeding, or did he just hear Angelica say Alex was staring at his ass? Colour flooded his face and he was suddenly very warm. “I uh, I don’t know what you’re talking about, that’s - that’s not-“

“Mhm, stammer all you want, I know what I saw,” Angelica smiled as she backed towards the door. “And honestly, I don’t blame him for staring,” her eyes flickered meaningfully down to John’s butt and with a wink, she was gone.

John stood there for a moment, and blinked a couple of times as he went over what Angelica had just told him. She couldn’t be right, Alex was his best friend, he wasn’t interested in John like that. Besides, he was clearly into Eliza, and surely Angelica wasn’t that dense. 

But, the more he thought about Alexander checking out his ass, the more aggressive the butterflies flapping around his stomach became. Alexander Hamilton was so distracted checking out _his_ ass, that he stabbed himself in the leg. _Oh shit, Alex._

John snapped out of his thoughts at the reminder of Alex’s injury and dashed back towards their cabin, supply bag in hand as he desperately tried to forget what Angelica had told him; _damn her._

When he re-entered the cabin, Alex’s was still sitting at the table, his fingers drumming a staccato pattern against the wood, his good leg bouncing up and down. 

“Sorry, I got, uh, held up,” John said as he moved toward the table. He pulled a chair around and carefully eased Alex’s injured leg onto it, before pulling another chair around for himself.

He sat by Alex’s calf, and leaned over to dig around in the medical bag for alcohol and a rag.

“I was wondering if you had forgotten about lil ‘ol me,” when John looked up, Alex was pouting and he snorted. 

He ripped open a new rag, and poured some alcohol on it. “Never. Angelica cornered me before I could leave.”

“Wha-Ah!” Alex wailed, his leg jerking away when John pressed the rag against his wound. John pulled back, eyes wide.

“Sorry, this’ll hurt,” he added, sheepishly.

Alex glared at him and snapped, “A little late for the warning, don’t you think?”

John frowned and Alex’s eyes immediately softened. “Sorry, I shouldn’t have snapped at you like that.”

“It’s okay I deserved it,” John responded softly. “I’m going to clean your leg now; this’ll hurt.”

A small smile graced Alex’s lips before John got to work. He pushed through Alex’s gasps and curses, knowing from experience the faster it was over with the better. Actually that’s a lie, alcohol against an exposed wound was horrible anyway it was done. John felt for the guy, he really did.

John did his best to work efficiently and he finished in a fairly short amount of time in his opinion, silently patting himself on the back. Now that the blood had been cleared away, the wound wasn’t quite as unpleasant to look at. John felt better now that he had a more concrete visual confirmation that Alex was okay.

He quickly applied the salve to the wound, and got to work binding it in the bandages he had brought back with him. As he worked he could feel someone’s gaze on him, and he looked up to see Alex’s dark eyes watching him with intensity.

“What?” John flushed.

“Just thinking,” Alex’s voice was deep, but he didn’t elaborate, and only looked out the window.

John’s brow furrowed, and he waited a beat before he continued wrapping Alex’s leg. While he wrapped, John couldn’t help but let his eyes drift back up to Alex’s face. Alex was hot, John wasn’t going to deny that; he was passionate, loud, and wasn’t afraid to go after what he wanted. He also had a strong nose, soft, red lips and a complexion to die for. In John’s opinion, he was the total package. A package John was suddenly realizing he wanted for himself.

He watched as Alex’s tongue dipped out to wet his lips, and felt himself unconsciously biting his own bottom lip in response. His eyes trailed lower, following the strong line of Alex’s jaw, down the tanned column of his neck till his skin disappeared too soon below his shirt. John found himself picturing sliding into Alex’s lap, unbuttoning his shirt the rest of the way exposing his toned chest…

Alex cleared his throat, and John’s eyes snapped back up to Alex’s face, face burning.

“Are you okay?” Alex’s voice was marred with worry and John swallowed.

He had just been caught basically ogling his best friend, by said best friend. Oh god.

“Uh, yeah, all good, a-okay, you?” John almost winced at his own words. 

Alex smirked in amusement. “Not great,” he said, nudging his leg, bringing John back to the present. “You done?”

“Oh,” John looked down, “almost,” and quickly finished binding his leg, before making sure it was secure enough to stay. “There, you’re good to go.”

“Ah - thank you my dear Laurens, you are a medical marvel,” Alex proclaimed again as John began to put the supplies away with a laugh.

“No problem Alex,” John responded without looking up. He stopped when Alex’s hand landed on his arm, and he let out a shaky breath before looking up to meet Alex’s eyes.

“Seriously,” There was a shine in Alex’s eyes that John recognized, but had never had directed at him and his voice was tender. It caused John’s heart to hammer in his chest in a way he hadn’t noticed before, but now was sure it had in the past. “You’re a good friend.”

_Friend._ The word hit John like a load of bricks and he let out a sharp breath before he responded honestly. “I told you Alex; I’d do anything for you.”

“So you and Angelica, huh?” Alex blurted out and John tensed at the sudden change in topic.

“No! She just uh, was trying to get under my skin - you know here. But no, she’s a great person and friend, but no just a friend,” John babbled, watching as Alex’s face changed from impassive to grinning.

“Ah, I see,” Alex trailed off, his smile coy. That’s when John realized how close Alex had leaned forward, and the soft pattern he was rubbing into John’s forearm.

John forced a smile, and removed his arm, Alex’s hand dropping to the table with a dull thud. John threw the rest of the supplies back into the bag, a little haphazardly before standing, the chair screeching uncomfortably against the floor. They both flinched.

“I’m… going to go bring this back and update George. You’ll be okay on your own for now? I’ll come back to help you get back outside,” John glanced at Alex, but moved toward the door.

“Uh, ye-yeah, I’ll be fine,” Alex’s voice was distant and John felt his heart ache. He knew it was wrong to treat Alex so shortly, but he couldn’t risk their friendship. Besides, Alex was interested in Eliza, and specifically _not_ him, his best friend.

“I’ll get you something to eat, yeah?” John looked over at Alex, but he was looking out the window again.

“I’m not hungry,” he didn’t look over. “And I’m kind of tired, tell George I’ll skip the rest of the competition.”

John’s face fell and he nodded sharply even though Alex couldn’t see him. “Oh, okay - Sure… See you later then, Alex.”

“See you later, John.”

John bit his lip and without another word, stepped out of the cabin.

**Author's Note:**

> the camp au continues! i'm starting final exams next week so i probably wont be able to write for a bit... but alas this au is not dead i will continue it. thanks for all the comments and kudos so far! if u wanna cry with me over dead historical figures being in love u can find me at @santalafayette on tumblr.


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